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Tw Sh Destructive Behaviour - Blog Posts

1 year ago

I'm relate this post so much, but the saddest fact is that I can't cut myself very deep, even though I want it. I wanna see at least derma, not this little cuts that heals in a week.

The euphoric feeling i get when the blood is dripping from my cvts can't compare to anything else in this world


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6 months ago

WARNING:

POSSIBLE NSFW & SH MENTIONS

I just got a message from I think a bot or maybe a scammer trying to get me to be his sugarbaby or something like that.

I blocked of course but it got me thinking…

Even if it wasn’t a ploy or something I just wanna say:

Bitch in what world am I sugar baby material?😭I’m a hopeless, fat virgin who cuts herself to cope with stress(which doesn’t even work anymore), can’t maintain a healthy friendship to save her life, and will throw a hissy fit when things don’t go exactly as she wants it to go.

I struggle doing minimal tasks such as getting up in the morning, brushing my teeth and taking a shower.

I spent the last two days doing absolutely nothing but sleeping and scrolling on my phone, praying that I get more online attention.

They say people are complex but if I were a rubix puzzle i’d be a fucking dodecahedron.

I’m a mess and I wear that fact on my sleeve.

I doubt that I can handle a relationship, let alone a transactional one.


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6 months ago

WARNING:

SH + STARVING

It wasn’t even worth the trouble. I feel nothing. All that it did was leave an ugly mark and leave a burning sensation.

Fuck I’m such a hideous thing. These scars make it even worse.

I wish I was thinner and flatter and prettier and had a nice smile and didn’t have this goddamn lazy eye everytime I take a photo.

I wish I didn’t have to resort to doing this to feel something good and relieving because nothing feels like it’s working anymore.

I don’t even know if I wanna eat rn. My parents are calling for dinner and I’m hungry but I’m so desperate to lose weight. I’ll do anything at this point.

I just wish I was born a different person.


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