Hi, I Hope You Are Doing Well🌹

Jason, baby, where have you been 😍

This is what it looks like when I piss btw

Raining rainbows

A lot of adulthood is shouting “AUGH MY LAUNDRY” hours after you put it in the washer/dryer and running to go fetch it

haymitch seeing a bunny: "how could I possibly kill a creature that brings to mind my girl?" 🥺

snow seeing mockingjays:

lord the peasants are so loud today

No, I don't hate Fifty Shades of Grey because it's freaky. Do whatever you want, I don't care. You know why I hate Fifty Shades?

Because Christian Grey had every opportunity to become Batman and he didn't. He had the dead parents, he had the money, the brooding- he was SET. And instead of becoming the Dark Knight, what does he do? He becomes a freakazoid.

Unforgivable.

need you to see this banger combination of signs i saw today

Reasons I'd get kicked out of Camp Half-Blood

1- telling Chiron to "stay gold, Ponyboy"

2- belting the chorus of "sweet home Alabama" every time I see a couple in the camp

3- making your mom jokes to Athena and Aphrodite kids

4- randomly spraying Percy with a squirt gun to check if he's really water resistant, even when he's not expecting to be in contact with water

5- approaching random campers and reminding them who their half-siblings are (ex: "yo, Nico, did you know you're related to Hitler?)

6- hiding a noise machine in the Hermes cabin and playing the star Wars scene "Luke, I am your father" every time he eneters/ making it play Hamilton at all hours of the night, so we can fall asleep to the sound of our father's voice

7- telling kids to "read between the lines", knowing full well they can't even read the lines themselves

8- convincing the younger, more gullible Demeter kids to grow weed

9- bribing the Hephaestus kids into making me a gun that shoots celestial bronze bullets, because there is no way in Hades that I am about to go after monsters just wielding some pointy sticks

10- sneaking into the Hera cabin to sleep, because what do you MEAN I, a claimed daughter of Hermes, don't get a bed in my own daddy's house? Yeah, no, I'm staying over at grandma's, the goddess of motherhood. Smite me.