Loki: Mental Illnesses Are Like Pokémon Cards.

I’m crying. I have a personal name for this ship. Fe3. If you don’t get it you’re uneducated.

morgan is smart. pepper/tony/rhodey ot3 🥰🥰🥰

Loki: Name a more iconic duo than my fear of abandonment and instinct to self isolate.

Loki: I’ll wait.

Thor: You and me.

Loki: *tearing up* a-alright.

Do you guys want to chose the winning card for my cards against humanity with the avengers? 

Me responding to this post getting over a hundred notes despite being some bullshit I made on the bus:

Responding to a kidnapping attempt part 1:

Tony:

Peter:

Bruce:

Natasha:

Clint:

Thor:

Steve:

Bucky:

Sam:

Loki:

“What do you know about infectious diseases?” -teacher

“They spread” -person

“Does that make sluts diseases?” -me

Peter talking to a tired Thor: So what’s Loki to you?

Thor: The reason I get up in the morning...

Peter: Really?! That’s cool

What Heimdall watched happen:

Loki: Hey...

Brother

Thor: *continues snoring*

Loki: Blergh *stabs him*

I never sleep cause of you

Tony: Hey lokes, what ya doing?

Loki: Just some light research on genetic’s.

Loki: I’m going to eliminate all the cancers.

Tony: Oh wow. That’s impressive-..

Loki: Then the Virgo’s.

Tony:...

I have one chapter posted and about a dozen in working progress. It’s called Genetic Soup.

P.s I know it’s a stupid name. Think of any good ones and send them to me.

The spider that bit Peter Parker’s was from a cross-species genetics lab right? Think of the possibilities for fanfiction and headcanons.

P.S. I’m starting an au oneshot book about this. It doesn’t exist yet though. It will be on Wattpad because I can’t find my drafts on Tumblr ever. @adopted_by_hestia is the account

TW: Dark humor.(?)

I can't stop thinking about Tony and Peter casually joking about death and shocking everyone around them like us Gen z's do with our friends.

~~~~~

Peter: I hope the light at the end of my tunnel is a fucking train.

~~~~~

Tony: I used to be a playboy but now all I want on top of me is 6ft of dirt.

~~~~~

Random bad guy: I'll snap your neck

Peter: I'll let you

~~~~~

Tony: I swear to God I'm gonna start a hit list.

Peter: I volunteer

~~~~~

Kidnapper: *hands them a gun* One of you has to die.

Tony: I will

Peter: No let me do it

Tony: Get behind me I'll shoot both of us

~~~~~

Robber: *Aiming a gun at Peter but hesitating to shoot him*

Peter: Would you like me to pull the trigger?

~~~~~

Bad guy: I'll kill you.

Peter: I'll fucking do it for you.

~~~~~

Tony: Don't come Heimlich me if I start choking cause that's my ticket out of here and if you save me then your fake and just want what you can't have.

~~~~~

Tony: *staring at a vase of dead flowers*

Peter: lol you wish that was you huh?

loki: today is a quiet day

loki: very quiet *looks at thor who's sleeping peacefully*

loki: i don't like quiet *pulls out daggers*

loki: *stabs thor*

thor: loKIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

loki: ahh no more quiet, i like it