Why Are All The Jews Suddenly Posting About Cheesecake, You Ask? Because It’s Shavuot!

Alan Lee’s illustration of the enchantress in Merlin Dreams by Peter Dickinson

Dindrane: claimed I could remember my unborn sibling from Heaven, then gave a description of said sibling which turned out to be accurate 

Taliesin: went outside during a lightning storm and tried to fly away by using a Mary Poppins umbrella to catch the wind while making dramatic poetic declarations (I got about two feet in the air)

Sebile: tried to practice necromancy to talk to a dead Monarch butterfly

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This isn’t something I did, but an evangelical organization once showed up at my family’s house to see whether one of us was the Messiah, and that seems pretty Galahad-esque.

arthurian legend characters as weird things i did as a kid

Arthur: created clubs for the sole purpose of making myself in charge of them

Guinevere: played barbies, but the plot of the game was that they were fighting in world war iii

Lancelot: pretended to be an exterminator by spraying actual hornets with a hose, and somehow not getting stung, against all odds

Gawain: held stair-jumping competitions, and regularly jumped down around 10 stairs at a time

Merlin: designated a particular tree branch for reading and refused to let anyone climb this branch

Gaheris: held ‘screaming contests’ in my backyard to which invited my friends (this is exactly what it sounds like and it was banned by my mother immediately)

Dinadan: eaten spaghetti while riding a bike

Galahad: made a graveyard for bugs

Morgana: recruited a friend’s little brother to spy on said friend because she wasn’t talking to me

Mordred: accidentally made a gallon of poison

Fun fact: the musician who sang “Puberty Love” in Attack of the Killer Tomatoes was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

Of course, he’s also the drummer for Pearl Jam, but it’s less entertaining when you put it that way.

okay sorry thinking about false guinevere again and I think I get it now. like if you were raised alongside your beautiful sister, the beautiful daughter of the king, and she gets everything and everyone loves her and she marries the guy who pulls the sword out of the stone and she’s the queen now and everyone’s looking to her and knights are dying for her and you look exactly like her and you have her same face, your father’s face, but the man who raised you isn’t him because no one can talk about what the king did to your mom and everyone pretends it’s normal but actually they all know you were born from violence and you were never supposed to be born and there she is, your sister, with your same name, your same face, the most desired woman alive, and she is everything you’re not. i might also do something evil tbh

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Morvran Afagddu Appreciation Post

I am obsessed with Morvran Afagddu’s life story. With how he’s expected to amount to nothing to the point that his mother tries to make him talented with a potion and someone else gets it instead and he grows up to be a great bard anyway. With how no matter how great he is, what he says is doomed to be obscure forever. With how that’s contradicted by Uther Pendragon himself mentioning Afagddu while Uther is dying. With how that shatters all the timelines, since Morvran is a child at the start of Arthur’s reign and also survives Camlann. With how he survives Camlann because of his appearance, the reason why they thought he wouldn’t get anywhere in the first place. With the life he built and kept partly because of the things which people thought were wrong with him. With how he might not even be one person, might be two characters who blurred into one and in the process made a story which is one of Arthuriana’s most hopeful, a story formed from fragments and only existing on the boundaries of other people’s but existing nonetheless.

Morvran might be my favorite knight of the Round Table, and he’s not even technically a knight. A lot of Arthuriana is tragic, at least when you look at overarching narratives, and that pathos is extremely compelling, but it's also refreshing and joyful when a character can rise above it and endure against odds that seem impossible, and that's what Morvran's story is to me.

References: Ystoria Taliesin, "Angar Kyfundawt", "Marwnat Vthyr Pen", Culhwch ac Olwen, Marged Haycock's notes in Legendary Poems from the Book of Taliesin

“Lancelot Bears Off Guenevere” by Henry Justice Ford

In La Tavola Ritonda, the Orkneys' loyalties are a bit different: all of them except for Mordred are in on trying to reveal the affair, with Gawain as the leader. They prepare an ambush, which Lancelot escapes after killing Agravaine, Gaheris, and eight unnamed knights.

As would be expected, Gawain furiously tries to avenge his brothers—though it isn't quite the same, since he already had a vendetta against Lancelot and might have duelled him anyway.

Regardless, Gareth, presumably still alive but now unimportant to the narrative, is never heard from again.

In a way, Lancelot saved Gareth (and Gaheris) in killing them, bc we will never know if they would've taken Mordred's side. And I think a lot of people in and out of the narrative would like to assume Gareth wouldn't but we don't know and I genuinely believe it could've gone either way. AND in overshadowing their protest in his own actions, Lancelot obscures a key piece of evidence that Gareth and Gaheris might have gone against Arthur.

As much as I love these boys, the most "important*" thing they do is to die, and become martyrs for Gawain's vengeance against Lancelot. And like many martyrs what they actual thought, believed, or would have done stops mattering when the bodies hit the floor....

*or well, memorable. Most impactful on the main through line, and most incorporated across texts and retellings

Agreed. This is fantastic. The mention of Camlann rather than Badon was a bad oversight. I’m confused about the sequence of alluded-to events in The Dream of Rhonabwy. On a reread, it seems like the Battle of Camlann happened well before Badon and like both Arthur and Mordred survived it, but this too could be a misinterpretation.

There was no Eliwlod reference intended, but Arthur’s nephew who turns into an eagle would certainly fit in the list.

The source for Arthur being a Red Ravager who makes it so that plants won’t grow where he’s walked for seven years is a quotation from Bromwich’s Trioedd Ynys Prydein.

The part about Merlin and Taliesin is a reference to the Vita Merlini, which I haven’t read, only read references to, and I made a notable omission. Along with them in the woods are Merlin’s sister Gwenddydd and his friend Maeldinus.

A few things which are “canon” somewhere for people who are worried they’re stretching it too far

Arthur was killed by a giant cat. 

Arthur killed the cat.

Arthur didn’t fight the cat. Kay did.

Kay and Bedivere use salmon as taxis. 

Lucan is half giant, half lion. (This Lucan, Lucano in the original Italian, is evil and not related to Bedivere). 

King Arthur raided the land of the dead.

The human knight Caradoc Briefbras has three half siblings: a dog, a horse, and a pig.

A large portion of Arthur’s troops was killed a while before Camlann by his nephew’s attack ravens in self-defense. Arthur and said nephew were playing chess at the time and neither did much to stop it.

Merlin retired peacefully and went to live in the countryside with Taliesin.

Wherever Arthur walks, plants die. They don’t grow back for years.

Arthur had a spunky (half?) brother who died in battle after making a mysterious oath.

Dagonet is more or less able to run the kingdom when Arthur is gone. His biggest error is overspending on mercenaries.

Guinevere has an evil almost identical twin half-sister.

Hector beat up all the best knights except for Galahad while possessed by a demon.

Gawain plays tennis.

Gawain has used a chessboard as a weapon.

Near the start of his reign, Arthur left Lot in charge of the kingdom and went on a quest with a sassy parrot.

Gawain or Galahad succeeded Arthur as king.