Follow Your Passion: A Seamless Tumblr Journey
is now a good time to say that alex is PEAK representation of 'gay in theory'??
hear me out, he has very loving and supportive friends and he's comfortable and relatively open with who he is. but we know that he's experienced a lot of homophobia particularly from his parents, and i feel like his trouble expressing his affections with willie really show the impact that had on him.
dont get me wrong, part of it is definitely because of the whole 'willies being blackmailed' thing but it could easily be metaphorical and shit can have double meanings. that hug ?? the way he clearly cares a lot about willie but can't look him in the eyes and admit it even to himself because at that point he has to face the reality of his feelings and show vulnerability with them. it isn't often talked about, but a lot of queer people act very outwardly proud as a preemptive defense mechanism - what you say won't hurt me so dont even bother. because if they show vulnerability then they're letting the prejudice get to them, and they can't do that. hence why alex hesitates from the hug, otherwise comfortable with physical affection but knowing how much this particular hug will mean to him and being scared to face it, particularly in front of the people he loves. because in his experience, the people he loves have been the ones to judge him for it.
its a huge misconception that gay people like to 'show it in your face' that they're gay, and complaining about it is inherently homophobic. but there is some truth that gay people like to call out homophobia before it even comes up, so as to feel some power over it. acting confident and proud is our way of protecting ourselves from a world that has always preyed on our vulnerability.