Stardew Valley Gn!farmer - Blog Posts

everyone's blond husband <3

When you first met him, you were a bit overwhelmed by his “pep.” The boy with the spiky, blond hair who always wore a smile despite his ever-healing lip piercing. He did have a wonderful smile. No wonder he was always showing it off. It made you smile to yourself, just thinking about it. 

In your first year on the farm, you were swamped with work. From chopping down trees to make room for sprinklers to trying your best to fix up the old community center in the middle of town, you’d just barely make it into bed on time every night. This meant you had barely any time to meet your neighbors, much less get to know them. Your over excited neighbor, however, seemed to have made it his mission to spend as much time with you as possible.

One day, in mid summer, when you were replanting melon seeds, his shadow darkened your property. You’d heard him coming before you saw him; he’d been humming to himself a song he’d been writing for his band. He had asked you, in the spring, what genre of music you liked and you’d tried to answer in a way that he would’ve approved of: “hi-energy dance music.” He seemed to accept this answer and promptly started writing such a song with his long-time best friend.

“Hey,” he said as he approached. 

You greeted him without looking up from your field, “hi, Sunshine.” 

This was a nickname you’d started calling him after he’d lost at pool for the seventh time in the three weeks you’d known him. You had always known him as a ray of sunshine, but when he lost at pool, he seemed to get downright depressed. The nickname was born from insistent teasing, but after a while, it became a pet name of sorts.

The boy rolled his eyes when he heard the nickname but you could swear you saw his cheeks tinge pink in the afternoon sun. 

“Whaddya need? I have about fifty more seeds to plant today, but then I can hang out if you want,” you said, face buried in your work.

“Hmm,” he said. Then, “can I help? I dunno how you want me to plant, but maybe I could water some of them? …if that’d be helpful, I mean.”

You looked up at him. “Yea. Yea, that’d be great. Thanks, Sunshine,” you said and smiled at him.

He smiled back at you and picked up the copper watering can that had been discarded early in the morning when you found your crops ripe to be plucked. 

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

About an hour later, you had both finished your chores, and you were sitting on your porch while he stood in front of you. You leaned in just enough to examine each of his features closely. He was quite beautiful, you thought to yourself. His silver lip ring, his enormous blue eyes, his golden hair, covered up today with a baseball cap. You reached over and pulled it off his head. He started. 

“Why did you do that?” he asked.

You shrugged before saying “I wanted to see your face better.” You reached up to brush his hair out of his face and smiled. Suddenly, he grabbed your hand and pulled you toward him. You were about to say something, but he kissed you, and it felt like you were on fire. He was maybe the third person you’d ever kissed and, by far, the best one. 

He smiled brightly and said cheekily, “alright. I gotta go. Mom’s making dinner and she needs me to swing by the general store before she can start cooking.” He looked you up and down before simply saying “bye!” and turning on his heel.

HEHE hope u like it is my first sam post :3

Shane, My Beloved

Shane had never considered himself a romantic person. In fact, Shane never considered himself at all, really. He had a routine that he followed, didn't think about how he worked a minimum-wage job at thirty-three, and when pretending that everything in his life was totally fine got to be too much, he drank. A lot. It was almost certainly unhealthy, but it got him through the day - for the most part.

When the new farmer moved into the dingy cottage north of his aunt's ranch, he didn't think much of it. He went to Joja Mart that day, same as always. He stocked the shelves, same as always. He saw the other town drunk wandering the aisles of Joja, same as always. He went straight to the Stardrop Saloon after closing, same as always. He saw the drunk again, same as always. He saw all the other Monday regulars at the Saloon, same as always.

But.

There was someone new today. It must be that new farmer, Shane thought to himself. Where did they move from? Was it Zuzu City? Somewhere across the Gem Sea? Hmm, I can't seem to remember... Whatever. It doesn't matter anyways. Not like I care. Even if I did, everyone always leaves. No use getting to know anyone new, Shane finally settled on that thought and took another sip of his beer.

Suddenly, a shadow crossed the floor to his corner by the bar. After introducing themselves to the local chef and the blue-haired barmaid, they seemed to walk toward Shane. He looked up. The farmer was staring at him, obviously exhausted from a hard day's work and socializing, but, curiously, appeared to be satisfied. Happy, even.

This perplexed Shane. He understood that his niece and his chickens and the boy with the bright yellow hair were all happy, but this was because they had never left Pelican Town. They didn't know what else was out there. They were blissful out of ignorance, not out of true joy. This farmer, they seemed different. They certainly weren't ignorant to the richness of city life. So why? Why did they seem so content? He had half a mind to ask them right out when the farmer asked him a question first:

"You're Shane, right? You work at the Joja Mart? I have to ask... Is it because you hate the shopkeep in town as much as I'm beginning to?"

Shane laughed out loud. He couldn't remember the last time he'd done that. It felt nice. The farmer smiled, bigger, this time, somehow. It made Shane feel... Well. He didn't know how it made him feel, but he knew that it was a feeling that he'd not had in a very long time.

He finally answered the farmer's question after a moment. "Unfortunately, my employment at Joja is not a condition of my spite, much as I wish it were. The store in town doesn't keep any staff at all. That's why the store's closed on Wednesday."

The farmer nodded and said "oh well. I simply had to ask." Then, after a short pause, they said "I'd better head off, I have some more planting to do tonight." And with that, they turned on their heels and walked out of the Saloon.

Shane watched the door for a long time after the farmer had closed the door. He hoped that they would turn around and run back inside. He hoped they would trip and fall over the threshold on their way out the door. He hoped they'd leave and never return.

He didn't know anything about the farmer but after this interaction, he knew one more thing about himself:

he was totally and utterly fucked.

teehee I love Shane ok anyways im thinking I might make this into like a series but we shall seeeeeeeeeeee xoxo