ya’ll for real though, if you don’t own a bathtub and wanna do those “soak in apple cider vinegar” things, get a spray bottle (dollarstore sells ‘em) and put 2/1 ratio of water and vinegar and sit in your shower, lean foreword and let the spray hit your back, and spritz your cooch with the mist and let it soak it in a while before you rinse it
if you’re getting to the age or point in your relationship where you think you might be ready to start having sex; here are sum tips
1. if you feel nervous or anxious about it at all, you might not be ready. if you’re just doing it because you’re partner is pressuring you, or all your friends are encouraging you, you’re not ready. When you’re ready, you’ll be comfortable with the thought of having sex without having to be coaxed into it
2. Please, please, please use protection, at least one form or another. Especially if you’re a teenager, you probably wouldn’t want to get pregnant, and don’t forget that STD’s exist and can ruin your life
3. Make sure you’re doing this with someone you’re absolutely comfortable with. They will inevitably see you naked and if the thought of that makes you uncomfortable, you’re not quite ready, which is fine too
4. To avoid awkward situations, make sure you have a good time and place with enough privacy. If you don’t want someone to walk in on you or passerby’s to see you, make sure you’re somewhere that’s not possible.
5. Remember that you don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with and that even if you’ve started something and feel like stopping at any point, this is valid and a good partner will respect your decision
6. Ok, now if you’re ready and all of the previous tips are in order, make sure you’re in your best shape. I don’t mean your body or anything like that. Any body is a good body. But I mean make sure you’re feeling confident. Be hygienic, make sure you’re clean and smelling your best and wearing something you feel confident in.
7. Have fun, be safe. Sure, losing your “v-card” only happens once, but it doesn’t have to define you. So if even if you wanted to do this, and nothing went wrong, and you still regret it, that’s okay, you’ll have a million other chances.
Love y’all!! 💘
end of beginning - djo
If you need…
Rest and recuperation:
- take a nap
- sit in the warm sunshine
- cuddle a pet
- take a bath
- go to bed early
- meditate
- forget all the yoga and just lie in corpse pose for however long you need
Self love:
- put on body lotion
- change your clothes into something more comfortable
- wash your hair
- light some candles
- write a love letter to yourself
- list 10 good things about yourself
Reminiscence and nostalgia:
- watch a childhood classic on TV
- clean your room: make it cozy and safe
- care for yourself the way your guardians would when you were a sick child
- do a small task or hobby that you used to love - listen to old music
- play a game from your past
Energy:
- eat a healthy meal
- put on some upbeat music
- drink ice cold water
- change into clothes that make you feel good but aren’t pyjamas
- go for a walk
- challenge yourself to do the things you want to do and reward yourself after
Companionship:
- get in touch with a friend
- go to a public place, like a coffee shop
- say hello to a stranger
- call your mum
- message a long lost friend
- arrange to meet someone you love
- join online groups of people with similar interests
Health:
- do some light exercise
- drink a glass of water
- do some yoga or stretches
- go to bed early
- take a short walk or jog
- eat something healthy and tasty
- clean your home
To express yourself:
- write about how your feelings
- dance to your favourite music
- sing
- put on makeup
- paint or draw
- bullet journal
- write a story, some poetry or a diary entry
- change your hairstyle
Comfort:
- drink something warm
- go somewhere you feel safe
- spend time with safe, loving people
- watch a lovely tv show or movie
- get under some blankets
- if it’s cold, sit by a fire
- cuddle someone or something
- give yourself a little hug
self checks are a very important part of self-care and good mental health! make sure you check up on yourself and do things that help you when you don’t feel so good.
“I love you”… “It’ll pass”
GOD FLEABAG BROKE ME
In Mandy Len Catron’s Modern Love essay, “To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This,” she refers to a study by the psychologist Arthur Aron (and others) that explores whether intimacy between two strangers can be accelerated by having them ask each other a specific series of personal questions. The 36 questions in the study are broken up into three sets, with each set intended to be more probing than the previous one.
The idea is that mutual vulnerability fosters closeness. To quote the study’s authors, “One key pattern associated with the development of a close relationship among peers is sustained, escalating, reciprocal, personal self-disclosure.” Allowing oneself to be vulnerable with another person can be exceedingly difficult, so this exercise forces the issue.
The final task Ms. Catron and her friend try — staring into each other’s eyes for four minutes, with the suggested duration ranging from two minutes to four. But Ms. Catron was unequivocal in her recommendation. “Two minutes is just enough to be terrified,” she told me. “Four really goes somewhere.”
Set I
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
Set II
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
17. What is your most treasured memory?
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
20. What does friendship mean to you?
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Set III
25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling … “
26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share …”
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
The problem isn’t falling in love, it’s staying in love.
Source: http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
wilson + looking at house
Have a signature accessory, clothing article, make up look, or hair style.
Have a fragrance. Make your hair scents and lotions match your perfume.
It’s okay to dine alone. Bring a book or people watch.
Love your hair. Research the best brands for your hair type and use masks weekly.
Your nails don’t need to be fancy, but keep them maintained.
Stay worldly. Know works of art, artists, designers, films, books, politicians. Spend your lunch break reading the paper or a magazine.
Crying is not a weapon. It’s okay to feel your emotions, but never use them as an excuse to avoid your problems.
Jealousy is boring. Love and appreciate others. If you can’t love them, forget them.
Boost others. Flatter others, but don’t deprecate yourself in the process.
Don’t sulk. Don’t let the whole world know your problems. If you don’t want someone to give their opinion, don’t share your situation.
Your life is between you and the universe. Don’t post your personal matters for others to see.
Don’t emotionally blackmail others. They hurt you? Let them know and then move on. It’s between the two of you and not the world.
Cook dinner. Cook dinner and listen to music, the radio, or a podcast.
Treat yourself to candles and flowers. Be your own cheerleader.
Take naps. Take a cat nap on a Sunday afternoon with the blinds open and the fan on high.
Drink your water, eat your vegetables. Take care of your body.
Never have time to take off your jewelry before bed, but always have time to take off your makeup. Your nighttime skin regime is important.
Mystery is beautiful. You don’t need to reveal much of or about yourself.
Never appear other than as you are. Don’t lie about yourself. Embrace who you are at your core.
Do you have like a checklist or something of things that need to be done before you can move out? I have over a year to get ready, but I'm not certain what "ready" means exactly. What needs to happen before a person can live on their own (in the USA)? Thanks for answering, love your blog!
I’m realizing now that I have lots of posts that detail different parts of this moving into a new apartment process, but none that discuss everything. So this post is essentially a conglomerate of four different posts: Adulting 108, Moving (On Your Own), Living On Your Own, and Apartment Hunting 101.
But here they are, in step by step order! Enjoy!
Overview: There’s no getting around it, apartment hunting is a stressful process. The waiting and wondering gets the best of everyone, so give yourself a break and remember not to be too hard on yourself. The more prepared and decisive you are, the better off you’ll be!
1. Step One: The most important step in this entire process is coming up with your list of “Need and Won’t”. This list can always be adjusted in the spur of the moment, but will act as a baseline to help you easily disregard impractical apartments. Before you even start your search, sit down with any roommates (SO or otherwise) and come up with a list. Here is my list:
Need: Dishwasher, pet friendly, heat included.
Won’t: First floor apartment, all or mostly carpeted apartment, no closet space.
2. Step Two: Decide your price range. The paycheck to paycheck life is not a great one to live, so try to find an apartment that still allows you to put anywhere from $100-$500 into savings every month. Figure out how much you make monthly, with taxes taken out. If you’re paid every other week, this is two paychecks. If you’re paid every week, this is four paychecks. Start with your total monthly income, and subtract the following expenses. Let’s say you make $1,000 with taxes taken out:
Rent - Let’s say you’re living with a roommate, and your rent is only $500 per month.
Electric - My electric expense is $60 a month for a one bedroom. Once again, you’re living with a roommate so let’s say that you pay half of that. $30.
Internet - $30 a month internet only. Please don’t waste your money on cable. Just use your mom’s Netflix account.
Travel expenses - I spend about $85 a month on gas. Let’s say you use public transportation and spend around $100.
Food - Figure you’ll be spending $100 per person each month. So that’s another $100.
Misc expense: Let’s just add an additional $50 worth of expenses on. Because you never know what’ll happen.
That leaves you $130 a month extra to put in savings or to use in the event of an emergency! That’s awesome. Substitute your own numbers in, and figure out how much you can afford for rent. Immediately disregard any apartments that do not fit in this budget.
3. Step Three: The best way to find dependable apartments is to consult with your fellow apartment renters. Consult with coworkers, friends, family- anyone who is currently renting in the area that you would like to rent in. Get the inside scoop on potential apartments, both their advantages and their pitfalls. If you don’t know anyone who is renting where you’d like to rent, here are some other apartment hunting options:
Craigslist: Obviously
Drive-bys: Literally drive around until you find a cool looking apartment complex. Find their rental office and go right in, this is how I found my first apartment.
Your college: The Dean’s Office will have a list of apartment offerings to give kids who don’t qualify for on-campus housing.
This Site: A list of the top ranked apartment hunting sites.
4. Set up an appointment: After finding a potential apartment, consult with the landlord or apartment representative to set up a date and time to see the apartment. Respond promptly to any email or phone call they leave for you. On the flip side, if they aren’t prompt in their response to you RUN.
The first apartment I ever looked at, my boyfriend and I showed up on time and the landlord wasn’t there. We called her and she said that she was running late, and told us that the apartment was open and we could show ourselves inside. Serious red flag, but we gave it the benefit of the doubt and went in. Long story short, she never showed up. She gave us a tour of the apartment over the phone and kept saying that she was five minutes away, but never came. We later found out that her rental office was two minutes from the apartment we looked at. Talk about flakey! We told her we weren’t interested, if she can’t even show up to show us the apartment, how the hell can we depend on her to fix any problems we might have? Because you’re young and inexperienced, some landlords will try to give you the run around. Your age is no concern of their’s, and has no bearing on how you will act as a tenant. Here are some red flags for flaky landlords:
Not contacting you within one day of leaving them a message. Disregarding the weekends.
Not showing up when they say they will.
Repeatedly telling you that you’re “young” or “inexperienced”.
Telling you that the apartment “is good for college kids” or “a good first apartment” (that just means it’s a shit hole).
If they tell you that the apartment has a large turnover (people are leaving for a reason).
If you speak with one person on the phone, and meet a different person who shows you the apartment.
If they can’t or refuse to give you the exact rent amount.
If they tell you that have to “run some numbers” based on your history. An apartment’s rent should be the same for everybody.
If they can’t answer basic questions about service providers for the apartment.
If you get a weird vibe from them. Listen to your intuition! This is the person who is going to be responsible for fixing all your apartment related problems, you will be dealing with them every month at least. If they seem unreliable, don’t sign the lease!
5. Step Five: Find your appointment buddy! Never, ever, EVER go to look at a potential apartment by yourself. I don’t care how friendly Wendy seems online, she may be a serial killer. There’s no way to tell. Here’s a list of people who can accompany you:
Your older brother
Your boyfriend/girlfriend
Your Aunt Meredith
Your second cousin
Your friend who can scream really loudly
Your Mother
Your Step Mother
Your old nosey neighbor who smells like cats
Literally anyone you can trust
Bribe them with chocolate, I don’t care. Take someone with you! If you absolutely cannot find anyone to go with you, then you need to take additional precautions. Here are some options:
Kitestring
“Share My Location” on your Iphone
Pepper Spray
Posting to Facebook the address you are going to and when you are expected to arrive and leave.
Rescheduling your appointment to a date and time when you can be accompanied
A mental checklist is good in theory, but will you remember it when you’re actually at the prospective apartment with your Aunt Meredith? I think not! Make a physical list of some of the following points, and feel free to add your own. my list is super extensive, but that’s just who I am. I am detail oriented.
Tuck this list in your back pocket and consult it when the person showing you the apartment is not looking.
Expense related
How much is the rent?
Is the rent just the rent, or are there any amenities included? Some apartments include heat, hot water, or electric expenses.
Is hot water included (if the apartment has a washer/dryer in it, then the water is probably a separate expense)?
What Internet service providers are available?
What electric service providers are available?
Do I have to pay for garbage removal?
What is the average electric expense that other renters deal with?
Ask when rent is due. Find out what the rent check procedure is.
Basic
What type of heating/cooling is provided?
What appliances are in the kitchen? *If there is no oven or fridge and you are required to buy your own then run*
What is the apartment complex turnover rate?
Do you have a choice of carpet vs. hard wood floors?
Will window blinds be provided? *If the apartment complex won’t pay for something as simple as window blinds then the landlord is a cheapskate and can’t be trusted*
Is there a “curfew”? Most apartments have a time of night when all the tenants are supposed to be quiet. This is generally not enforced.
What will your address be?
Additional
Is any furniture included?
Is there a Laundromat in the complex? If not where is the closest one?
Similarly, is the Laundromat in the complex card operated or quarter operated? Do you have to pay a fee for the card? Is there a quarter dispensing machine?
Will you be given a free parking permit? *If parking is not free then run*
Ask about local shopping and gas stations.
Ask where your mailbox will be.
Ask what their pet policy is. (some apartment complexes charge an fee)
Ask what their policy on repainting/decorating is.
Ask what their maintenance request policy is.
Ask where the nearest dumpster is.
How often does the complex loose power?
Is there a nearby police station or fire department?
General check
Check all cabinets (for bug infestations or mouse droppings or that they open properly).
Open all the windows and check to see that there are screens installed. Especially important for us cat owners! If there are no screens- are they going to install screens before you move in?
Check that all the light switches work.
Check that the water turns on.
Flush the toilet.
Check all the closet space (for size, mold, and water damage).
Check how all the doors are set (some apartments will put doors in incorrectly and they’ll never close properly).
Check the outlets (bring a phone chord and plug it in).
Check any balcony access.
Take a look at the paint- is it chipped? Is it stained? Will they be repainting?
Knock on the walls to see how hollow they are (hollow walls require studs if you want to hang anything up).
Open up the oven and make sure it’s clean. If it’s not clean make it clear that it should be cleaned if you want to move into the apartment. It’s not your job to clean up after the previous tenant.
Check that none of the floorboards are sticking up/creaking.
Check for nails and screws in between hardwood floor, tile and carpet (I’m not even kidding).
Check your phone to see how much cell service you have.
Can you hear any neighbors? Could you hear them in the hallway?
If the apartment you visited fits all your criteria, feel free to tell the landlord that you’re interested in pursuing this apartment. This way they can advise you of the next steps. Before you sign ANYTHING, visit the apartment complex twice more to make sure that everything is kosher. Do NOT tell the landlord that you will be coming by.
During the day: Do a drive-by of your prospective apartment to see what it looks like during the day. Is it safe? Are there lots of people standing around outside? Is it loud?
During the night: Come back another night to check the safety of your apartment. Ask yourself- would I feel comfortable taking the trash out late at night? Having friends over? If the answer is “no” then run…
Overview: After choosing an apartment that you like, there are lots of steps that need to be taken before you can actually move in.
1. Rental application. You will need to fill out some sort of rental application when applying for an apartment. You’ll be asked for previous addresses (if you’ve lived in previous apartment complexes landlords will actually call and ask about how good of a tenant you were), if you’ve been convicted of a crime, pay stubs, references and/or credit information. If you don’t have a credit score, some complexes will require you to co-sign the lease with someone who does, like a parent. If a landlord does NOT ask you to fill out any kind of application, I’d advise you to run for the hills and not rent from them.
2. Approval. Apartment complexes will mail you a packet of information after you’ve been approved. This will list your new address, what power company services are available, apartment amenities, school districts, local attractions, as well as your next steps. My current apartment complex also mailed me what Internet providers are available, which was a nice extra bonus.
3. Initial expenses. Your next step will be to put down a “security deposit”. This will either be exactly the same or very close to the amount you pay for rent monthly. This deposit ensures that you don’t destroy the apartment, if you do they won’t refund you. You will also be asked to pay your first month’s rent in advance. Most rental companies will only accept money orders for these initial expenses, you have to go to your bank to get these. They’re essentially checks that take the money out of your account right away.
4. Apartment check. After you’re approved for an apartment, ask to see the actual unit that you’ll be moving into. Make sure that you see said apartment before signing any lease. Notice how loud your neighbors are, how good of a cell signal you have, the condition of the apartment, etc. This is a pretty extensive list.
1. List it up. Make a list of everything that you will need to accomplish before you are ready to move. This includes items that need to be packed, people that need to be contacted, pet accommodations, etc. I love lists, but you may not, so use any organizational technique that works for you.
2. Divide and conquer. After you’ve made your list, organize items based off of how much time they’ll take you. Packing will be fairly time-consuming, so this is something you’ll want to invite friends over for and break up over several days. I like to have “moving” parties whenever I’m getting ready to move, essentially I buy some chips and dip, play some Trap, and invite my friends over to act as my minions. Something like canceling your subscription to Cosmo will take you very little time and energy to do, so it’s something you can do when you’re ready for a stress-free activity.
3. Contact companies. Speaking of canceling your Cosmo subscription, you will need to update your address with all of the companies you use. If you’re no longer going to be using that company, you’ll need to call them and tell them when to end your service. If you’re going to continue to using that company, you’ll have to call them and tell that you’ll need an address change. Give them the exact date you’ll be moving so that they can backdate your information. Some examples of companies:
DMV in the county you’re moving to (if you’re going to drive)
Your doctor’s office
Your college (even if you graduated, they send out alumni letters all the time)
Your credit/debit card company
Your bank
Your phone company
Any government programs you’re a part of
Any companies that you have loans with
Your health insurance company
Your auto insurance company
Amazon
4. Pre-move in List. Make a shopping list of all the non-perishable items you will need before moving in. I’m talking trash cans, first aid kits, toilet paper, laundry detergent, etc. I like to work on this list over the span of several days, and do a large shop before moving in. Your moving day will be stressful enough as it is, don’t add the stress of missing something you need. Here’s a pretty good list.
5. Electric set-up. Use the information packed your landlord sent you to find out who your electricity provider is. Call them, you’ll probably get a pre-recorded message. Choose the option that says something along the lines of “set up electricity”. You will be connected to an actual human being, who will ask you to read your new address. Tell them to turn on power to your apartment a couple days before you move in. They will set up a billing plan with you (ask to be put on a budget, it’ll save you lots of money) and give you your account information.
6. Internet set-up. Setting up your internet is similar to setting up your electric, but a bit more hand’s on. Most cable/internet companies always have some sort of deal going on, a year or two years of discounted service. Be aware of when this discount will end, and contact the company to see if they can offer you a new deal. If Verizon is offered in your area, I strongly advise you to use them for Internet service. i was on a two year plan with them that saved us $40 a month on internet service, and after it ended they put us on a new plan that is now saving us $42 a month. Fuck yeah! Also make sure to set your internet installation date for the day after you move in, so that you’re not stuck sitting in your internet-less apartment, unable to read my blog. Know that most internet companies charge installation and routers fees, and if you complain enough they’ll drop one or both of these. Just be like “I’m a poor college student” or threaten to go to another internet company.
7. Send ahead. If possible, send/drop off some of your items ahead of time. If you have a family member or a friend that lives nearby where you’ll be staying, ask if they can hold a few boxes for you. You can also mail yourself packages and ask your local post office to hold them for you, but you’ll need to arrange that ahead of time.
8. Forwarding address. You will inevitably forget something, so make sure to leave your forwarding address and contact information with your ex-landlord, college, ex-roommate, etc.
9. Signing the Lease. The last thing you will do before moving into your new apartment is signing a lease. You will be given a copy of the lease to keep, as well as the key to your apartment and/or laundry key. Keep your copy of the lease in a safe place, and make sure to get duplicates of your apartment keys.
1. Take your time. Don’t try to unpack everything in one day! Take some time to explore your new space, and decide where to put everything in a leisurely way. There is no set schedule for moving.
2. Assistance. If you have friends/family helping you make the move, assign them specific tasks so that nobody spends their time pestering you and asking “what do you need help with?”. You can even decide these tasks ahead of time, during your plane or car ride over.
3. Be neighborly. You’ll likely meet some neighbors during this process, and make sure to stop and greet them, even if you’re in the middle of something. First impressions do matter, even when they shouldn’t, and spending thirty seconds to greet someone in a parking lot may save you a lot of hardship in the long run. Ask your neighbors to recommend local attractions, places to eat, what laundromats to use, etc.
4. Check everything. During your first few days moved into you new apartment, look around and make note of anything wrong. Outlets that don’t work, scratches on the wall, peeling paint, etc. Report these ASAP to your landlord to be fixed. This will give you a good idea of how put together their maintenance unit is. Make sure to offer maintenance workers water and be polite to them when they’re fixing anything in your apartment.
1. PKW. Phone, keys, wallet. Every time you go anywhere. Check twice. The worst part of living on your own is having to rely on yourself to never forget to lock yourself out or leave your wallet at a sandwich shop in a mall. Make absolutely sure you have duplicates of your keys (I would get a couple made) and give one to a friend who lives nearby who you can count on. I also like to keep an extra set inside the apartment itself in a secure place, just in case. Your landlord can let you in during office hours, but giving a key to a trustworthy friend helps you 24/7.
2. Cleaning routine. You don’t have to sit down at a writing desk and draft this out, but spend a few minutes coming up with a basic cleaning regime for you to follow. It’s definitely easier to do a little each day, but if that doesn’t work for your schedule set aside at least an hour and a half during your time off to get your apartment spotless. I don’t know about you, but whenever I deep clean my apartment I feel like I’m living in a hotel for a day, and I absolutely love it.
3. Make a “moving” shopping list. This is everything you will need (minus food) for your first week at your new place. Do a big shop, and get all the essentials out of the way: first aid kit, cleaning supplies, tape, cat food, etc. Your first week moving into your new place will be stressful enough, you don’t want to be halfway through setting up your living room and realize that you forgot to buy trash bags.
4. Secure yourself. I’m not the most agile or fast person in the world, and I do live in a mid-sized city that has a good deal of crime. The apartment complex I live in is very safe, but I still like to double lock my front door at night. It might be smart to keep some pepper spray or a baseball bat somewhere in your apartment, just in case.
5. Stay social. Even the most anti-social person gets lonely. Make sure to hang out with your friends, not just your co-workers, your actual friends. Get out off your apartment every few days and go see a movie, get a cup of coffee, go people watching at the park, etc. It’s easy to get depressed if you’re living alone and doing the same things the same way every day- allow yourself to mix it up.
6. Meal prep. It can be stressful and seem useless to cook complicated or “fancy” meals when you’re living on your own. Plan your meals for the week and make a list before going shopping. Get yourself enough food to make a variety of dinners that will only take you fifteen minutes. If you do want to go crazy and make steak and mashed potatoes for yourself, make enough for two meals. Also, nobody is going to think poorly of you for stocking your fridge with a couple frozen dinners.
7. Customer service. Living alone means that you are going to be doing a lot of talking to customer service representatives. Get comfortable talking to people over the phone. Tell the rep what you need as quickly as you can, and try to be polite because customer service at a phone center is a garbage job that doesn’t pay well. On the flip side, don’t be afraid to ask for a manager if you’re upset or unhappy with your service. Take their survey at the end of your phone call, tell them how unhappy you are. It’s someone’s shitty job to look at all those surveys, no complaint goes unheard. Companies with great phone service: Verizon, Apple, Amazon. Companies with awful phone service: USPS (literally the worst), electric companies, health insurance companies.
8. Guest space. This is not required, but it’s a good idea to have some sort of space for a friend to stay the night. A friend of mine had a bad breakup, showed up at my apartment with ten minute’s notice, and then fell asleep on my couch after an hour of crying. It as 7:30! Whatever, she needed it. Keep an extra blanket and pillow in your closet, I like to keep travel sized shampoos and conditioners in my bathroom cabinet on the off chance a guest wants to use my shower. I got these at a hotel for free, but they’re available at CVS and other pharmacies.
9. Toilet paper. Don’t let yourself run out of toilet paper! I like to buy more when I notice I only have one roll left. The same deal goes for paper towels.
10. Enjoy. Living on your own is simoltaneously exciting and exhausting, but an all around must-have experience. Enjoy the freedom to forget to make the bed, to decorate your bathroom however you want, to have ice cream for dinner, to watch reruns of Friends and cry when Rachel decides to move to France. Make sure to give yourself lots of space to move at your own pace, but please remember to eat three meals a day and to go to the doctor’s for a checkup at least once a year!
7 QUESTIONS YOU SHOULD ASK AT THE END OF EVERY JOB INTERVIEW.
Click here to find out why these questions help you.
-i recommend going in with little makeup or no makeup bc your face WILL get wet and messy super quick. if you do plan on wearing makeup, make sure you set that shit with powder puff, and press that shit into your skin HARD and use a setting spray. also wear a super waterproof mascara, bc your eyes will water, and have tissues nearby for after so you can wipe your face. also, try not to eat at least 2-3 hours before so you don’t accidentally throw up. also if you don’t know this person well or don’t know their status use a damn condom.
-tease your partner. start with lots of kissing (or a massage 😋 look here) while rubbing their dick through their pants. go slowly. dirty talk is good here too. tease them for a while, let the anticipation build up.
-sucking their dick while they’re lying down with your back arched and your ass in the air is super sexy, or you can try being on your knees if your partner is more of the dominant type. when you finally pull their dick out, start off with a simple handjob. then, graze their dick with your mouth, and start long licks from their balls to the tip of their dick.
-dry head is unpleasureable. use LOTS of spit. put their dick to the back of your throat. your gag reflex will kick in and you will gag on their dick, causing you to produce lots of spit. the sound of you gagging will turn them on also.
-start sucking their dick,by using your hands and your mouth. start by gripping (not super tightly,just firm) the base of their dick in your hand(s), then wrap your mouth around the rest, so your lips meet your fist. then move your hands and your mouth up and down in a rhythmic motion while sucking. use more suction going up then going down. do NOT use your teeth.
-now i know we all want to be cute, but you can’t be cute when sucking dick,sorry. be sloppy as hell. lose your inhibition. go all out.
-sound effects can really help. loud sucking + slurping + gagging + moaning = them nutting faster
-eye contact is important. looking up at them while you suck their dick will make them go crazy.
-don’t forget about their balls either! lightly massage,lick and suck on them as well. don’t do it too hard though, it can be uncomfortable.
-if your mouth gets tired,you can go back to giving them a hand job, or if you’re well endowed in the breast area, you can put their dick between your breasts and titty fuck them. dirty talk is good too. either way be sure to give your mouth a break so you don’t tire yourself out too quickly.
-if you wanna be an extra bitch & deepthroat, use throat numbing spray. you can find it online or in drugstores by the medicine & shit. spray it in the back of your throat beforehand.
-when they nut, you have a few options. swallowing is ideal but if you’re a freaky bitch you can take it to the face or titties. only do this if you know this person is STD free, otherwise just let them cum in the condom.